sunny skies.

despite the cold & rain that melbourne has been having lately, we're actually experiencing some pretty decent weather today. i was outdoors for less than an hour but the soft warmth of the sun on my skin brings a certain kind of joy like no other.

i can't wait till it's officially spring.

the beauty of poetry.

when i was younger i had a book of classic poetry that i would eagerly read from front cover to back, sometimes even reciting them aloud... and this was how my appreciation for poetry developed and grew. i enjoyed every poem and story we discussed in English Lit at school although most, if not all, of my classmates hated and dreaded the subject. i even tried my hand at composing poems, often surfing the internet for inspiration and to share my works with others.

obviously i wasn't Shakespeare or Wordsworth material, or i would be effortlessly spewing out proses and sonnets to this day.

somewhere along the way, my ability to put thoughts & emotions into words has failed me.

i never knew it was disposable.



i carry your heart with me by ee cummings

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)



all that is gold does not glitter by jrr tolkien

all that is gold does not glitter,
not all those who wander are lost;
the old that is strong does not wither,
deep roots are not reached by the frost.
from the ashes a fire shall be woken,
a light from the shadows shall spring;
renewed shall be blade that was broken,
the crownless again shall be king.



dreams by langston hughes

hold fast to dreams
for if dreams die
life is a broken-winged bird
that cannot fly.
hold fast to dreams
for when dreams go
life is a barren field
frozen with snow.

what if?

tell me, did you sail across the sun
did you make it to the milky way to see the lights all faded
and that heaven is overrated

tell me, did you fall for a shooting star
one without a permanent scar
and did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there


sometimes we have to give up the things we've taken for granted all along.

whether it's closet space in exchange for a studio apartment the size of a shoebox
or someone you love(d) in exchange for a life of loneliness

there are always sacrifices to be made.

these things never come easy.

and most of the time we never know if it's worth it. there's always a possibility that we'll end up happier... and more often than not, there's a chance that we'll wake up one morning with the realization that we are worse off than we have ever been.

curiosity did kill the cat after all... but let's see what it does for me.

lost.

there's still a little bit of your taste in my mouth
still a bit of you laced with my doubt
it's still a little harder to say what's going on


i (still) don't know what to do.

all eyes on China.

20 minutes till the Beijing Olympics closing ceremony!

i'm not from China nor do i speak the language
i don't know jack shit about the country's history
and i don't practice most of the customs and traditions

in fact, apart from my appearance, the only true relation i have to my native country is my love for Chinese food.

but seeing how far the country has come and knowing it will further amaze us in the future,
watching the athletes give it their all and crying with pride & joy when they succeed,
puffing up with pride while watching the cultural performances in the opening ceremony,

i can say without a doubt that i've never been prouder in my entire life to be Chinese.

when all is said & done.

maybe i'm too tired to try anymore
maybe i can't grow the hell up
maybe i don't understand why
maybe i'm not responsible nor sensible
maybe i'm lazy beyond belief
maybe i'm too dependent on you
maybe i dream too much and do too little
maybe i'm not that kind of girl
maybe i've disappointed you one too many times

but thank you for loving me all the same.

all i ever wanted was to make you proud of me.

you said you always were, but it's not enough. it never is.

left in the dark.

you're not the only one who's confused.

i, too, am caught up in this battle with my head and my heart, of what's wrong and right - and try as i may, i can't seem to sort out this raging turmoil of emotions to figure out what i really feel about all of this.

i'm just messed up like that, you see.

i didn't mean to make things so hard for you.

i wish we could be completely honest and sit down for an open conversation. coward that i am like the Lion who lacks courage, i cannot bring myself to look you in the eye while we slowly break each other's hearts and spirits. i hope that someday you will reflect upon this and understand; you were all i ever needed and yet that wasn't enough for us to survive the drought of what this has become.

when it rains, it pours.

it's been raining all week.

and the storm that's destroying what's left of you & me won't be receding anytime soon.

o hai - the welkum entry.

hot, strong & bitter - no sugar, thanks.

& that's how i like my coffee.